A first time or something new

Step by step

Exciting is allowed.
And you set the pace.

The first time

Intimacy is still new to you or you want more experience, and we take the time for it. You don't need to know or be able to do anything.

1. We get to know each other first, by phone or video, and you ask your questions.
2. The first appointment can just be a date, and sex isn't required.
3. If you want to go further, we build on that, in one appointment or spread over several.

When touch is difficult

After something you went through, touch is difficult, and you tell me what is and isn't okay.

1. We start with a call, and you don't have to tell me what happened.
2. We agree on what is and isn't okay, and during the date I regularly ask how you're doing, so I never go past your boundaries. If something doesn't feel right, say so, and I stop immediately.
3. The first appointment can be very small: having dinner, talking or just a massage of your back or hands.

I'm not a therapist, so if you also want to talk about what you went through, a GP or psychologist can help you further.

Finding out what you like

Maybe you don't know exactly yet, or you have a fantasy you never talk about, and together we find out what you like.

1. First we talk about what you're curious about and what you'd rather stay away from.
2. We start with something small, for example a massage, and clothes can stay on.
3. Afterwards I hear what you liked and what you didn't, and we build on that next time.

Curious about kinks? Read the part for beginners.

When your body works differently

Your body does it its own way: tell me what I should know.

1. We get to know each other first, and you tell me what I need to know about your body, nothing more.
2. We agree on the practical side: where we meet, how you lie most comfortably, aids and breaks.
3. The first appointment can start small, and if that goes well, we see what else is possible.

I'm not a care provider, so I don't do lifting or personal care, and we discuss that beforehand.